w  rd 2 the woss

I was on a group trip of sorts, and when I wasn’t messing around and having fun, I was observing my friends converse with one another . I used to be a shy dude, so it comes as natural to watch others in social situations.

 

 

It was a beautiful sight. Everyone’s eyes were engaged and warm. You’d see their pupils dilate when they talk to one another, which indicates a sense of genuine interest for what the other person is doing, or talking about. When I returned to regular school life, I found that people weren’t as interested in what I was saying. I could tell from their eyes; most of my schoolmates’ eyes were stale or cold, some with quite constricted pupils. When I really tried to look them in the eyes it would hurt.

 

 

I told my friend about it, since she happened to be on the trip as well, and she said she felt the same way-- but WHY was my

question.

 

 

I believe that we’re at an odd social climate, where people only have acquaintances. You know, people you hang out with, but don’t truly know on a personal level. No one seems readily comfortable with taking on deeper subject matter anymore. If the Breakfast Club occured today, they would all be talking about Tumblr. Recently, I tried to tell a friend that I wasn’t feeling well and she told me shut up. She was talking about mostly joyful light subject matter.

 

 

It’s quite hard for me to make friends because I do love to talk about life and explore theories and philosophies. I have really humorous tendencies, and people love to joke around so that’s a way I make my friends. People don’t talk to me on a bad day; I generally end up feeling off on days when I can’t seem to talk about anything serious if I need to.

 

 

There might be a stigma surrounding serious subject matter that everyone’s worried of, or their parents tell them not to talk about anything too serious in public (Mine do). I still hear of horribly sad things that go on in other people’s lives; serious subject matter is saved for one-on-one conversations, facebook posts, and quiet night-texting, perhaps. Occasionally people do allow me to share my thoughts and theories.

 

 

The undertones are scary, and hidden within the currents of the times. The phones of many people have pockets of music that has dark, quiet textures in the production, and subject matter that can get quite consuming, or concerning.

 

 

I’m not at all looking to have constant sad conversations. I’m looking for both the fun and the real.

 

At the end of that one week I was able to experience what I wished for again. A small selection of friends and yours truly in a darkened cafeteria. You know how they say small minds talk about people, average minds talk about events, and big minds talk about ideas? Well we were able to talk about all three. There was no superficiality; it was all great. I was actually satisfied here, and that’s very rare for me, these days.